Friday, March 11, 2016

From my Amigo Nikos: As I have heard elsewhere, "hurt people hurt people."


"The French philosopher Émile-Auguste Chartier (know as Alain), was said to be the finest teacher in France in the first half of the 20th century. And he developed a formula for calming himself and his pupils down in the face of irritating people. ‘Never say that people are evil,’ he wrote, ‘You just need to look for the pin.’ What he meant was: look for the source of the agony that drives a person to behave in appalling ways. The calming thought is to imagine that they are suffering off-stage, in some area we cannot see. To be mature is to learn to imagine this zone of pain, in spite of the lack of much available evidence. They may not look as if they were maddened by an inner psychological ailment: they may look chirpy and full of themselves. But the ‘pin’ simply must be there – or they would not be causing us harm."

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On Being Unintentionally Hurt

One of the most fundamental paths to calm is the power to hold on, even in very challenging situations, to a distinction between what someone does – and what they meant to do.
In law, the difference is enshrined in the contrasting concepts of murder and manslaughter. The result may be the same; the body is inert in a pool of blood. But we collectively feel it makes a huge difference what the perpetrator’s intentions were.

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We care about intentions for a very good reason: because if it was deliberate, then the perpetrator will be an ongoing and renewable source of danger from whom the community must be protected. But if it was accidental, then the perpetrator will be inclined to deep apology and restitution, which renders punishment and rage far less necessary. 

Picture yourself in a restaurant where the waiter has spilt a glass of wine on your (new) laptop. The damage is severe and your rage starts to mount. But whether this was an accident or a willing strategy is key to an appropriate response. A concerted desire to spill signals that the waiter needs to be confronted head on. You may have to take radical defensive steps: like shouting at them or calling for help. But if it was an accident, then the person isn’t your enemy. 

There’s no need to swear at them. In fact, it makes a lot of sense to be forgiving and kindly, because benevolence will imminently be heading your way.

Motives are, therefore, crucial. But unfortunately, we’re seldom very good at perceiving what motives happen to be involved in the incidents that hurt us. We are easily and wildly mistaken. We see intention where there was none and escalate and confront when no strenuous or agitated responses are warranted.

Make the jump here to read the full article

Via Sri Prem Baba: Flor do dia - Flor del día - Flower of the day - 11/03/2016

“Nós seres humanos, mesmo com tanta miséria e sofrimento, continuamos insistindo em acreditar que tudo se resume em dinheiro. Mas, precisamos ter coragem para admitir que o paradigma materialista caiu. O crescimento econômico não pode mais ser o indexador para medir o nosso desenvolvimento. O PIB não pode mais ser o fator determinante para o nosso sucesso. Dinheiro é apenas um dos aspectos da vida. É bom ter dinheiro, desde que ele não custe a destruição do planeta. Hoje não existe outra maneira de salvar o planeta a não ser a partir de uma mudança de paradigma. Chegou o momento de ampliarmos nossa visão, sem medo de fazer diferente - sem medo de sermos espirituais.”

“Nosotros seres humanos, incluso con tanta miseria y sufrimiento, continuamos insistiendo en creer que todo se resume en dinero. Pero necesitamos tener coraje para admitir que el paradigma materialista cayó. El crecimiento económico no puede ser más el indicador para medir nuestro desarrollo. El PBI no puede ser más el factor determinante de nuestro éxito. El dinero es apenas uno de los aspectos de la vida. Es bueno tener dinero, mientras que éste no cueste la destrucción del planeta. Hoy no existe otra manera de salvar el planeta a no sea un cambio de paradigma. Llegó el momento de ampliar nuestra visión, sin miedo de hacer algo diferente, sin miedo de ser espirituales.”

"Us human beings, even with all our misery and suffering, continue to believe that everything boils down to money. However, we must have the courage to admit that the materialistic paradigm has collapsed. Economic growth can no longer be the index with which we measure our development. Gross National Product can no longer be the determining factor of our success. Money is only one aspect of life. It is good to have money, but not at the cost of destroying our planet. At this point in time, there is no other way to save the planet without a paradigm shift. It is time to broaden our vision and without being afraid to do things differently or to be spiritual."

Via Ram Dass

March 9, 2016

When you have your game all together, and there is still a yearning inside of you, and you say, “I don’t understand why I’m still unhappy; I’ve got it all.” Well, that yearning is your ticket to spiritual awakening.

Via Daily Dharma: Lasting Happiness

First we have to let go of fixation on material things. This does not necessarily mean jettisoning all our material possessions, but it implies that we should not look to material things for lasting happiness.

—Traleg Kyabgon Rinpoche, "Letting Go of Spiritual Experience"

Obama and Trudeau at the White House: The complete speeches